14/07/15

Do You Want Glottal Fries With That?

Raspy, Creaky, Damaging

There are two speech patterns that are driving me crazy. One is upspeak and the other is glottal, or vocal, fry. Think Valley Girl.

Upspeak is the habit of making every statement sound like a question even if it’s not a question. When your voice lilts up at the end of a sentence, it sounds like a question. It sounds tentative. For instance, if you say, “Today is Tuesday” with your voice rising at the end, I think you’re not sure if it’s Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday. If your voice drops, I know you’re darn sure what day it is.

Intonation gives meaning to your words. Intonation also tells us something about you and your confidence. If you’re not willing, or sound like you’re not willing, to take a stand on what day of the week it is, I get the feeling you’re not too sure of anything.

Recently I saw a feature on NBC’s Today show that spotlighted a successful entrepreneur, Joy Cho. Joy has turned her graphic design blog into partnerships with Target, Mail Chimp, and Band-Aid bandages. There’s no doubt that she’s a success. If you go to her site, you’ll see that she certainly hasn’t let upspeak thwart her success. Upspeak may even be part of her cutesy-wootsie persona and brand. Yet during the interview, she ended every sentence with a question mark. She’s cute. Her products are cute. She sounded cutesy at the end of every sentence.

I found several clips of Joy on YouTube. In one clip, she was giving a keynote for a blogging conference. Interestingly, her upspeak wasn’t apparent in her keynote. Perhaps she was nervous when interviewed for the Today Show segment and upspeak revealed her nerves. If that’s the case, curtailing her upspeak would have allowed Joy to feel confident and come across as more self-assured. Who wants to appear self-doubting just because of a propensity to upspeak?

While Joy didn’t use much upspeak in her YouTube video, she displayed my second teeth gnashing vocal pet peeve: glottal fry.

Glottal, or vocal, fry is the tendency to talk in a creaky, raspy, irritating tone. This occurs especially at the end of a sentence when the speaker has run out of breath. Some say this is inspired by Kim Kardashian.

(Note to self: Topic for future e-newsletter: How the Kardashians have influenced society from big butts to butt facials to dressing your baby in black instead of gingham, flowered or puppy prints.) I digress.

The Atlantic Monthly magazine published an article positing that vocal fry might harm a woman’s job prospects. http://tinyurl.com/lbp6v4g  The article includes a clip of Zoey Deschanel frying her glottis like bacon on the griddle. Zoey is a talented actress, singer and songwriter. She’s also a multitasker who combines glottal fry with upspeak. Give me fingernails on a chalkboard and my neighbor’s teenage son playing drums 24/7 over the upspeak/glottal fry combo.

One of my clients said she used upspeak so she wouldn’t sound so authoritative. This brings me back to junior high where girls acted dumb so the boys would like them better. We worked on her de-upspeaking the end of every statement she made. She got a promotion and the boys still like her.

Both of these vocal habits can be cured by recording and listening to your speech, becoming aware of your upspeak and glottal fry, hearing how your voice can be improved and then taking corrective steps. To rid yourself of upspeak, lower your voice at the end of a sentence and raise it at the end of a question. Print a page of any content that includes a mix of questions and affirmative statements. Mark the questions with an upward arrow at the end. Mark the statements with a downward arrow at each period. Read aloud. Record. Listen. Repeat.

For glottal fry, take more breaths. Pause. Don’t speak a paragraph or even a sentence on one breath. Find a friend who will signal you if you fall into either of these pits.

While I’ve worked with men and women on upspeak, glottal fry appears to be a millennial female disorder. I say “disorder” because glottal fry can damage your vocal chords.

Thus, the next time your order a burger, order with conviction. It’s not a question. And, don’t have glottal fries with that.
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Lies vs. Truths

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